I remember one time a guy asked me how many months I was single. I said, four. And nervously laughed and added, 4 YEARS, not months. This was 2 years ago and my status has still remained unchanged. I’ve been single for so looooooong. Do I ask myself why? Do I feel any pressure? Hell, yes! With my social media flooding with engagement announcements, weddings, baby’s first birthday and whatnots, who wouldn’t?
So here are 5 Reasons Why I remained single all these years.
1. I wasn’t ready
As they say, the first cut is the deepest and when this happened to me, I just blacked out. I wasn’t angry or bitter. I was just NOT interested in jumping again into another relationship when I know I still have hang-ups.
Yes, get this: I love hard and I hurt harder.
2. I got busy with my job
I know its lame how we are defined by what we do. I mean, we are more than our jobs. But let’s just say if we judge people’s lives based on their careers, I’d say you would think my life is ‘put together’ and I got everything figured out.
This is why… I got so busy working and climbing the corporate ladder I (forgot to) did not date. Also being in HR could be fun until you like someone from the staff list and you know how company SOPs frown at workplace romances. So, zero chance.
3. I don’t need drama
Growing up with the coolest parents has taught me I can do anything I wish as long as I won’t hurt myself or others.
So it didn’t make sense to me how being in a relationship could make you a tyrant (a dictator). And quite honestly, I didn’t approve of my friends who always ask permission from their partner if they can do this or do that. I mean, girl come on, are you in prison?
4. “I like you, you like me too“ is just not happening
Okay, it wasn’t like I was a hermit all these years. I dated, could be an understatement… given I’ve been swiping left & right all these years.
Unfortunately, timing is a bitch and chemistry isn’t working. It’s always a case of:
A) “I like you but you like her or him”
B) “You like me and I like you.. as a friend.”
C) “I like you, you like me but you left.. like a ghost”
5. I won’t settle for anything less
I’ve been single long enough and have dated enough to know what I want and what I don’t want. So until timing, chemistry and consistency won’t align, I won’t settle for a so-called relationship just because everyone is on it. After all, I’m already a happy, cheerful single and my goal is to be happier. If I haven’t counted, I wouldn’t realize it’s been this long. I don’t see anything wrong with it really, so I don’t see why other people think singleness is a disease. LOL.
So, I’m throwing you the question, why are you still Single?
I am married but i like your post…very raw and cleverly written..
Good read while waiting for the train… makes me think!
I am single because LIFE IS SO GREAT. You don’t need someone TO BE HAPPY. I love my independence! But I’m not closing my doors, it’s just that, you don’t enter into relationships or get married just because you’re old, or your friends are getting married, or you need to be happy, or the WORST, who will take care of you when you get old? I HATE THAT COMMENT. Shouldnt we be marrying because we love the person and we want to build a family with that person? Not because we want to have someone take care of us when we get old – that’s so selfish, honestly. I am definitely and unquestionably happy being single, so there’s nothing wrong with that. (heart heart)
Keep writing yet!! Wohoooo! <3
Ahhhh exactly my sentiments Roxx! I’m not anti- relationships in fact I am a believer of it but if it doesn’t come it’s okay it’s not the end of the world! Thanks for sharing your thoughts Amiga!
Thanks Garnet. Haha Strong kaayo akong thoughts? Haha
Thanks Ms Merr. That’s straight from the heart. LOL