I have been 30 for a while.
I have been single for far longer than that.
Am I okay?

Generally speaking, apart from the mini breakdowns every once in a while caused by a lot of factors, I am okay. Don’t get me wrong, I am not a hater of men or relationships. In fact I am a softie and I am a romantic. I gush over rom- coms, I love happy endings, I cry at weddings!

 

But i think what happened is..

 

  • 1- I learned to stop obsessing and chasing romantic love. Yes, it can happen but not everyone is lucky enough to be there in the right place, in the right time to catch it. If you did, then you’re half way there, your only job now is to sustain and keep it alive. But we also know very well that romantic relationships require a lot of work and most people fail at it miserably
  • 2- Maybe I realized there is more to life than being defined by your status. You are YOU in the first place, you are your own being, you are your own woman (before you become someone’s girlfriend/ wife or even someone’s mom). And I think it is important you get to know who you really are, what you really want, you do what you really love before you rush to anything serious and long term where there is no turning back all because you panicked and you feel lonely that you’re 30 and alone.
I often hear my friends would say that all they want in life is to be a wife and a mother while being (insert a career here). Which always made me reflect if I had the same dream. I couldn’t recall ever agreeing, though I remember feeling horrified about childbirth, the sleepless nights, the post-partum and all the less desirable parts of motherhood that no one would talk about. I would hear friends would say they want a baby alone (without its father) which in my opinion is unthinkable. The more I reflect over what I hear, the more I couldn’t bring myself to want babies in general. Yes they are cute (and expensive) and cuddly but I am not fully convinced those are enough reasons to bring children of my own to this world.

To be 30 and single, I think I am okay.

 

I am okay with the idea that maybe one day I will find the love of my life whom I will fall madly in love with that I’ll agree to carry his babies. Or maybe not.

I am okay with the idea that maybe one day when my maternal instincts finally kicks in and my biological clock tells me no, I would be okay to adopt grown children and love them as my own

I am okay with the idea that maybe I will grow old single and alone. Or maybe I will grow old single and traveling the world with my other single friends and sleeping in a bed full of cash and okay, just try to picture it

The point of this post is, please give us a break, us who are 30 and single. You do not know us very well to understand what we want in our lives so please stop shoving to us what YOU think we must need to do. I assure you we are more than okay. 😃